Fear Hidden in a Stone

I fear that one day I might become so dispassionate, and so cold, that my mind and my heart will detach and become as disembodied as the wind.
Forever.

I fear that I will grow ever colder until my heart feels nothing, not love, not hate, but only a cool sense of apathy.

I fear I will become a ghost of who I once was.

I fear to be vulnerable, and I fear that I am afraid.

What kind of a future is this for me?
What kind of a person would that make me if I saw the edge of a cliff and ran directly off it?
Apathetic, or suicidal?

I still have time to turn from the edge, and more than that, I want to, because I see the person that I could become.

I must allow myself to feel and to love, no matter the cost.
No matter how much I am afraid.

Every day I must remind myself that hearts are made to feel, and they are made to bleed. Hearts are breakable, and no matter how hard I try I cannot change that.
Hearts were never made to turn into hard, cold stone.

And I fear that to be true-
more than anything.